Have you ever wondered which hurts the most: saying something and wishing you had not, or saying nothing, and wishing you had? 

- Unknown

10th grade

As I sat there in English class, I stared at the girl next to me. She was my so called "best friend". I stared at her long, silky hair, and wished she was mine. But she didn't notice me like that, and I knew it. After class, she walked up to me and asked me for the notes she had missed the day before and handed them to her. She said "thanks" and gave me a kiss on the cheek. I wanted to tell her, I want her to know that I don't want to be just friends, I love her but I'm just too shy, and I don't know why.

11th grade
The phone rang. On the other end, it was her. She was in tears, mumbling on and on about how her love had broke her heart. She asked me to come over because she didn't want to be alone, so I did. As I sat next to her on the sofa, I stared at her soft eyes, wishing she was mine. After 2 hours, one Drew Barrymore movie, and three bags of chips, she decided to go to sleep. She looked at me, said "thanks" and gave me a kiss on the cheek. I want to tell her, I want her to know that I don't want to be just friends, I love her but I'm just too shy, and I don't know why.

Senior year
The day before prom she walked to my locker. My date is sick" she said; he's not going to go well, I didn't have a date, and in 7th grade, we made a promise that if neither of us had dates, we would go together just as "best friends". So we did. Prom night, after everything was over, I was standing at her front door step. I stared at her as she smiled at me and stared at me with her crystal eyes. I want her to be mine, but she isn't think of me like that, and I know it. Then she said "I had the best time, thanks!" and gave me a kiss on the cheek. I want to tell her, I want her to know that I don't want to be just friends, I love her but I'm just too shy, and I don't know why.

Graduation Day
A day passed, then a week, then a month. Before I could blink, it was graduation day. I watched as her perfect body floated like an angel up on stage to get her diploma. I wanted her to be mine, but she didn't notice me like that, and I knew it. Before everyone went home, she came to me in her smock and hat, and cried as I hugged her. Then she lifted her head from my shoulder and said, "you're my best friend, thanks" and gave me a kiss on the cheek. I want to tell her, I want her to know that I don't want to be just friends, I love her but I'm just too shy, and I don't know why.

A Few Years Later
Now I sit in the pews of the church. That girl is getting married now. I watched her say "I do" and drive off to her new life, married to another man. I wanted her to be mine, but she didn't see me like that, and I knew it. But before she drove away, she came to me and said "you came!". She said "thanks" and kissed me on the cheek. I want to tell her, I want her to know that I don't want to be just friends, I love her but I'm just too shy, and I don't know why.

Funeral
Years passed, I looked down at the coffin of a girl who used to be my "best friend". At the service, they read a diary entry she had wrote in her high school years. This is what it read: I stare at him wishing he was mine, but he doesn't notice me like that, and I know it. I want to tell him, I want him to know that I don't want to be just friends, I love him but I'm just too shy, and I don't know why. I wish he would tell me he loved me! `I wish I did too...` I thought to my self, and I cried. 

my fave ustazah..

sopan ek..

ermmm..

siapa ponteng semayang.siap!

Peace you all!

still thinking of a very good title of it!

i Love Photography

Never thought that she'll be in someone blog. Honoured?

(*depend on the issues)

waiting..

Qhallis n toklang(*yang tgh geram nak geget dia)

Qhallis yg gatal gusinya.. :P

LAughter is the best medicine...

Not really about those medicine..straight to the point(*cliche)hahah..

Semalam, we were otw back home from my MIL's.On the highway..there's a lorry @ the fast lane..(driving 'bout 90 km/ hour)..BEAM !!! doesn't help..Then he(*refer to my hubby) said," Bodoh lah lori nih..hang nak slow p lah tepi!" Then we take left lane and overtake the lorry. Normal!!hahah but abnormal tu us was..after a mile driving, we met another lorry (as there's always a lot of lorry @ nite on highway) but this lorry on the CORRECT speed and lane..but we suddenly heard of small voice n very cute voice yelling @ the moving lorry like this " Hey,tepi lah..#%$^%&^%&* lori!$^%&^&*^* papa nak alu(*lalu)..while pointing out @ the lorry and with the angry face..FRown!!ahhahah..we're laughed like nobody business! Then i hug her n said " sayang, be patient!"..hahahhahah then she laughed @ herself...(*when i showed her angry face @ the mirror...

Then, as usual, as the engine start she''ll put the "Zee Abi"cd (*Zee Avi )..All the back n forth is Zee Avi..(even i myself love her music but not everyday lah kan...) but to qistina the music in the car is must be Zee Abi.. Yesterday nite also, while she's keep herself busy making  mess in the car, her father took out the cd from the player..we thought that she didn't realize that n but she was like.."aaaaa nak Zee abi..n grab the cd n put back to the player..we were like, as you wish!! then hubby said," Owh Qis suka ka?" ..n guess what my daughter reply??...(Dengan muka yang selamber .."sukalah") again burst laughing!!!

Today..

Why I need to blog today? Even there's a lot of works to do, chassing datelines and so forth..It's just that i think this is the best place for memory to be place in.. becoz from time to time we tend to forget  the past or unintentionally forget it due to alzheimer or what so called getting old. So, me and my hubby will sitdown n read this blog and we might say  these kind of words like " Oh really..we did that?..""really i did say that?"..

So ..it 's about that particular (23/12/2010)

 We were having Laksa as breakfast instead of other that we used to have as breakfast (* do i need to list up here..dun think so coz i dun really know what ur breakfast like)..that's not the issue here..then while eating of coz we 're chit chatting..and the issue was about 'BEING A GUARANTOR is the selling rite'..? So each n everyone of us was like in rellay team..non-stop (*it's shows that there are many issues about being a guarantor)even my mom is BLACKLISTED for being a guarantor to such a damn spoiled brat of my former neighbour..arghh drop this!

Then while i'm driving home after work(on the same day to be exact) i recieved a call from my SIL ask me a favor to be A GUARANTOR!!!!! to buy a car..WHAT?? this is so coincidently or really a guarantor day. So if u were in my shoes..what will you say.? How'll you react!? Then i just like "ermmm i'll talk to your brother (my husband)!" As expected, It's a NO! from my hubby eventhough that is for the sake of her OWN SISTER! when it comes to guarantor thingy..(* feel guilty of coz but just can't picture myself if something goes wrong!!)Play Safe!..Making Face? Still can tolerate with that..no big deal!..hhmmm

(*no guarantor photos taken..)

Beside words..

@ kampung yang sungguh nyaman..

Now they are Best Buddies